Romantic Love

                                                                              

                                                                                 Heaven or Hell?

"Romantic Love" is one of the most intensive and most elevating emotions you can experience in life. 

It can feel like a shower of stars, like an extasis or like 1000 butterflies in your tummy.

It is a warm and positive feeling that makes you want to climb the highest mountain.

Yet it can be quite exciting and motivating. 

On the other hand it can also turn into the most negative emotions.

There is no need to describe how that feels because probably everyone has made their experiences with getting hurt, sadness, betrayal etc.

Both sides of it can lead to a kind of addiction (emotional attachment) due to how deep romantic love leaves its marks on our heart.

 

In summary:

 If you look on "Romantic Love" very superficially it can be the most creating and the most destructive at the same time. 

Especially when the mind takes over the heart. 

(We will get to the deeper meaning of romantic relationships later in this text.)

 

Why are we seeking for Romantic Love?

There are several reasons why people are seeking for love from the outside: society, natural instinct, lonesomeness, sexual need, financial need, attention, boredom, impatience etc…

These are natural needs that grow in us through our lifetime and they are responsible to build up this desire for "Romantic Love" in us.

 

"External Love" takes over "Self Love"

 Why are people always looping in the same  unsatisfying realm of romantic love?

There are two main points in my opinion and I kind of touched it already in this text.

When "seeking external love" is taking over "finding self love" it is most of the time a sign that somebody is looking for love out of a lack instead of receiving love out of abundance.

What does it mean?

Very simple.

The desire for love from outside  is bigger than the love for themself.

What can be the result?

One outcome could be emotional attachment.

In the moment you fill that gap in you with the love of another person you depend on that love.

In some cases, especially when it is combined with the fear of being abandoned, that dependence can lead to an emotional addiction.

The "Love" -itself- as the most important thing in a relationship steps in the background because it is all about trying to keep the lack filled.

 

"Mind" takes over "heart"

(status, intelligence, surface vs. values and intentions)

Secondly the mind often plays a big role when it comes to find romantic love.

Through our lifetime we get taught that a "perfect" partner is always connected to certain conditions.

It must fulfill our dreams and be able to at least build a family or buy a house.

The more perfect the conditions are the more perfect the romantic partner is.

By focusing on that superficial attributes a lot of people forget about what really matters in terms of love. What makes relationships - that are based on that superficial properties - challenging, is that there is always the need on both sides to keep the conditions as they are:

the body needs to be trained, the brain needs to be filled with knowledge, the status needs to be held etc.

 Love is - again - in the background.

Love is a wonderful emotion.

It is the fundament of every relationship (no matter if  it is romantic, friendships, family etc.)

To make love flourish you need to connect with your partner on an emotional level and not on conditions.

 

How to connect on an emotional level?

Sharing the same values like for example gratefulness, respect, honesty and loyalty can help to meet the right partner on the same emotional wavelength.  

Our personal values get shaped by what is important for us and what makes us feel good in our daily life.

Or very simple...talk about your feelings!

 

Manifesting true love

So if you want to manifest a romantic partner on your side ask yourself the following questions and write the answers down:

1. Am I seeking a partner out of an internal lack? What lack is it? What can I do to fill that lack by myself?

2. Is the love I am able to give pure and genuine? Or is it connected to any conditions? What conditions and why?

3. Am I able to receive pure and genuine love? 

4. What are my values and intentions regarding a romantic relationship? 

 

To make a long story short

Love yourself until you reach a state of fullness! 

Do never ever seek for love outside of you ( give love and receive love->not seeking!)

Pure and unconditional "Love"  should always be the first intention for a romantic partnership!

 

Final thought and deeper meaning of Romantic Relationships

By being your most authentic self you will draw your most authentic partner into your life.

By sending out genuine and unconditional love into the world you will exactly receive that kind of love back! 

Sometimes we need to meet the same people over and over again to understand what really matters in terms Romantic Love.

Especially in this kind of love the so called "mirror effect" is very meaningful.

Our partner can reflect our deepest wounds of the soul.

Unfortunately, this often happens in moments when they trigger us consciously or unconsciously.

The next time you are angry with your partner, ask yourself where the root of the hurt origins and work on it 

See it as a gift!

(Check out Healing Core Wounds).

 

With Love.

Annabelle