Self Love

 

What is Self Love?

Self Love is the love you give to your most inner being.

It is nothing you find on the outside of you.

That`s why it is called "Self Love"

It is like any other kind of love should be.

Unconditionally.

You celebrate your inner beauty and accept all your shadows.

You take care of your soul as if it were a newborn.

Whenever it cries you comfort it and whenever it smiles you shine that smile to the world.

 

Why is Self Love so important?

The answer is not as simple as it seems these days.

Self Love today often gets very commercialized through material practices or even "spiritual" practices like meditation etc.

I am not saying that these practices are not helping you in terms of Self Love (I meditate too, daily!)

But as long as you are not connecting with your inner self meditation is just another practice to make you feel better for ...20 min +. 

If you really want to understand the importance of Self Love you have to connect with you on the inside.

 

Ask yourself:

"Who am I right now if had NOTHING and NOBODY?"

"What makes me happy then?"

"Can I be happy on my own?"

 

Self Love is so important because it gives response to the big questions in life. 

It is bringing  "YOU" into your consciousness again.

With this self-awareness you are able to overcome any emotional life challenge.

 

How to practice Self Love

You can of course keep it short and simple and book a wellness massage or buy yourself a new handbag.

But these typs of material things will not make you happy on long term and sooner or later you will also need more of it to satisfy you.

It is basically feeding your ego but not your soul.

 

 6 Steps to Self Love

1. Stop ignoring or suppressing your emotions!

 

Every suppressed emotion causes an injury on our soul and builds a layer on it.

Give your emotions any kind of expression. (by not hurting anyone!!)

Quite simply:

If you are sad -> cry

If you are angry -> scream, do sports etc.

If you are happy -> shine it to the world!!

If you feeling a positive or elevating emotion like happiness, love or gratefulness  shine it to the world! ->you can stop after Step 1 if you want =)

 

2. Find out your core wounds!

 

This is especially important for challenging or negative emotions like anger, sadness or fear.

Core wounds are deep seated emotional hurts that often arises in childhood as a result of traumatic experiences such as for example abuse, loss, neglect, rejection, shame etc.

These events often cause us to start suppressing our emotions at an early age as a protection mechanism.

What we cannot prevent is that life challenges repeatedly trigger these wounds and make them visible.

What we can influence, however, is how we deal with these triggers when they evoke certain emotions in us.

You can find more about core wounds here: Healing Core Wounds

 

3. Analyze your emotions!

 

Where do you feel it in your body?

Where is this emotion coming from?

What core wound did this conflict/situation trigger?

Example: you had a fight with your boss and now you are angry. 

Do you feel rejected? Ignored? Feeling of "not being enough"? Not respected?

Try to concentrate on the current feeling not so much on the situation itself.

Thinking too much about it can can increase the intensity of the feeling and you can get stuck in a

thinking-feeling loop.

On top you are not in control of situation anymore because it is already in the past.

 

4. Accept the emotion and let it go!

 

Tell yourself:

"okay, this emotion came up/is still coming up because it triggered my wound xyz from the past"

(Just make yourself aware of the core wound.

It is not necessary to revisit your childhood/past experience all the time just because you feel the same feeling again.)

"It is okay to feel this emotion right now!"

"It is not permanent and it will pass."

You can close the door to that feeling because it is just a memory from the past.

What did you do in the past to overcome this emotion?

How do want to feel instead?

5. Feel grateful for your inner strength and give love to yourself!

 

Self Love  -for me- really starts in the moment you can tell yourself 

"I Love you for being you!"

"You are amazing how you are dealing with all your emotions and life challenges."

"How can you still stand here after experiencing all of this?!"

"You are really inspiring!"

If you are struggling with having self-talk write it down on a piece of paper and hang it where you can't miss seeing it!

 

6. Put the focus on yourself!

 

Living a "self-centered" life means that you become the main actor in your own movie.

It is your life and you are the creator.

In the moment you are spending too many thoughts on people and situations who are out of your control,

you are blocking yourself and the flow of the universe.💫

On top you are tormenting your nervous system with the constant release of unnecessary stress hormones...

Let things happen and practice trusting!

The journey is always more important and more valuable then the outcome!

 

 

Final Thought

Self-Love starts with you!

By putting the focus on your original self you won`t only find inner peace and happiness but also you will stabilize your emotional realm faster, what makes yourself more resistent to life challenges.

Ask yourself the question again:

"Who are you when NOBODY and NOTHING is left?"

The answer is always...

YOU!

 

WITH LOVE.

Annabelle

 

Ready for Self Love Questionary? 💫👉🏼Self Love Questionairy